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Mindy Lee M. Lipsky

Certified Business Coach
Certified DISC Practitioner

 

610-705-3526

 

Message Mindy

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Motivation & Inspiration!

We all have obstacles… here are some ways to help you go over, around and through!

The Race

You may have heard my story before about running.  If not here’s the short version…  In 2009 I was told by 3 doctors that I would never run again.  I had the beginnings of stenosis of the spine, “crunchy” knees due to 5 surgeries from an ACL injury in High School and I was overweight.  I am the type of person that if you tell me I can’t do something I am going to prove you wrong!  So I began to lose weight and then in January of 2010 I started the couch to 5K program.  Long story short I ran my 1st 5K on April 10th 2010 and continued to run races until my ultimate race in October of 2011… The Hershey Half Marathon!

 

Half Marathon

 

There will always be people who tell you that you “can’t” or you’re “crazy”, “stop “dreaming”… I’m here to tell you that you CAN, you’re NOT crazy and NEVER stop dreaming!  I first heard this poem at a Mary Kay event probably around 1998… I still love this poem and I hope you enjoy it!  Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

 

The Race by Dr. D.H. “Dee” Groberg

“QUIT! GIVE UP! YOU’RE BEATEN!” They shout and plead,
There’s just too much against you now, this time you can’t succeed.
And as I start to hang my head in front of failure’s face,
My downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.

And hope refills my weakened will as I recall that scene.
For just the thought of that short race rejuvenates my being.
A children’s race, young boys, young men; now I remember well.
Excitement, sure, but also fear; it wasn’t hard to tell.

They all lined up so full of hope. Each thought to win that race.
Or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
And fathers watched from off the side, each cheering for his son.
And each boy hoped to show his dad that he would be the one.

The whistle blew and off they went, young hearts and hopes of fire.
To win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
And one boy in particular, his dad was in the crowd,
Was running near the lead and thought, “My dad will be so proud.”

But as he speeded down the field across a shallow dip,
The little boy who thought to win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch himself, his hands flew out to brace,
And mid the laughter of the crowd, he fell flat on his face.

So down he fell and with him hope. He couldn’t win it now.
Embarrassed, sad, he only wished to disappear somehow.
But as he fell, his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
Which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”

He quickly rose, no damage done – behind a bit, that’s all,
And ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore himself to catch up and to win,
His mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.

He wished that he had quite before with only one disgrace.
I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.
But, in the laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face
That steady look that said again, “Get up and win the race.”

So, he jumped up to try again. Ten yards behind the last.
If I’m to gain those yards, he thought, I’ve got to run real fast.
Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight or ten,
But trying so hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.

Defeat! He lay there silently, a tear dropped from his eye.
There’s no sense running anymore – three strikes and I’m out – why try?
The will to rise had disappeared, all hope had flew away.
So far behind, so error prone, closer all the way.

I’ve lost, so what’s the use, he thought, I’ll live with my disgrace.
But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.
“Get up,” an echo sounded low. “Get up and take your place.
You were not meant for failure here, get up and win the race.”

With borrowed will, “Get up,” it said, “You haven’t lost at all,
For winning is not more than this, to rise each time you fall.”
So up he rose to win once more. And with a new commit,
He resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.

So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been.
Still he gave it all he had and ran as though to win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he’d rose again.
Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered the winning runner as he crossed first place.
Head high and proud and happy; no falling, no disgrace.
But when the fallen youngster crossed the line, last place,
The crowd gave him the greater cheer for finishing the race.

And even though he came in last, with head bowed low, unproud;
You would have thought he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his Dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”
“To me you won,” his father said, “You rose each time you fell.”

And when things seemed dark and hard and difficult to face,
The memory of that little boy – helps me in my race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and down and all,
And all you have to do to win – is rise each time you fall.
“Quit!” “GIVE UP, YOU’RE BEATEN.” They still shout in my face.
But another voice within me says, “GET UP AND WIN THE RACE!”

-Dee Groberg

Mindy’s Comfort Zone Adventures: NYC edition!

If you read my social media or blog posts regularly, I am sure you have heard me talk about comfort zones before.  My tag line is “open the door to empower your future!” When I say “Open the door”, I mean the door to your comfort zone.  I practice what I preach!  I find some way to step out of my comfort zone weekly if not daily!  I am always trying a new networking event where I don’t know anyone or driving to a place I have never been before.  It is usually something mildly anxiety filled… except when I travel to NYC!

 

I have been to New York City a lot for leisure, but that has always been on an organized planned trip and with family or friends.   I have travelled to a few times this past year to visit my business coach.  I first travelled there for business in July of 2014, again in December of 2014, and again this past Wednesday.  For some reason going for business makes me so nervous.  I don’t know if it is worrying about being late, going alone, or getting lost… I just get very anxious at the thought of going to NYC.  My friend Emi travelled with me this time as we were attending the same event.

 Mindy & Emi

 

We started our day before the crack of dawn leaving our houses by 4:30 AM!  We drove to NJ to catch the NJ transit.  All was going well when we heard “Penn Station next stop” So we started to get off but I quickly realized this was not New York Penn Station but NEWARK Penn Station!  My first thought was… OH MY GOSH we got off at the wrong station… I proceeded to push everyone out of my way to get back on the train!  Not how I usually behave but I was in a panic!  We get back on the train and someone was in our seat!  AHHH!  We scurried to 2 open seats.  I just stared at the tickets in our previous seat wondering if I should have grabbed them.  I sat there thinking, “who names 2 stations the same 1 stop apart??!”  Then the conductor comes by and asks us for our tickets!  YIKES!  I stammered… “We were sitting there and got off at the wrong stop…” he saw the panic in my eyes, chuckled and moved on.  He must have thought “Rookies”!  Whew, crisis averted!  Emi and I decided we were just on an “adventure” and boy was I glad to be with her on this adventure and not alone!

 

We finally get to the correct stop and decided to get Starbucks for the 1 mile walk to the workshop site.  I have my Grande Flat White in hand ready to start walking.  I turned the GPS on my phone to pedestrian and we set out… of course we walked the wrong direction at first but I redirected us and we were on our way… 5 minutes into the walk I realized I was squeezing my cup so much it was spilling all over me!  UGH!  A slight panic attack followed, but I finally got that under control.  We arrived safely and on time… only took me about 20 to 30 minutes after that to calm down fully. 

 

I don’t know if it is the rushing, the sheer giant size of everything, the honking, the lights, the chance of getting hit by a car or taxi at every corner… I am just not a city girl… BUT I KEEP GOING!  I step out of my comfort zone into massive discomfort to grow myself and my business.  I keep showing up even when I don’t want to!  As a matter of fact, I am going back this weekend for TWO days!  I doubt I will like it, but it is important for me to keep doing it!  So tell me… where are YOU stepping out of YOUR comfort zone… go ahead… open the door… let the empowerment begin!

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Will you do “Whatever it takes?”

Before each laser coaching session, my coaching clients are asked to fill out a Session Prep Questionnaire to help us zero in on where our focus should be for that session.  One of the questions is, “What action/changes are you ready to take now?”  I often get the answer… I’ll do anything!  Only to find when we come up with some ideas they also come up with excuses as to why that won’t work.  Well, that only works once with me… I nip that in the bud right away.  You have to get uncomfortable to grow!  That’s why they are called growing “pains”!  I encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and “try something on” for a week or 2.  Find ways to develop baby steps to ease into the changes where you can.  You will most likely find that the expectation was worse than the action.  Are you buying into the excuses… it cost too much, I don’t have time, I could never do that, I don’t like the phone…

Whatever it takes

How long are you going to let the excuses stop you from reaching your greatness?? Get out of your own way and just do it!  If you need to, find an accountability partner or coach to help you and support you through it!  Say you will do whatever it takes and mean it!  It takes practice, but when you push yourself, reach and stretch amazing things begin to happen.  Tell me what you have been putting off.  Will you do whatever it takes?

Are you living the “definition of insanity”?

We have all heard the quote by Albert Einstein (or Benjamin Franklin, or Mark Twain or Rita Mae Brown) where he states … “The definition of Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results”.  Having a background in psychology I understand this really isn’t the “true” definition of insanity, but it sure does bring up a great conversation point!  When you are trying to improve or change but don’t change your actions the results can’t come to fruition.  Are you living this definition in your life or business?  Are you trying to grow or change your life or business in some way but keep thinking the same thoughts, setting the same goals, making the same plans, doing the same things?

DSCF5030

Often times we are stuck in a routine or afraid to make the changes necessary because they carry some risk.  What if I fail? What if I don’t recoup the funds I have to put out to try? What if I actually succeed? Gasp! More importantly… what if I don’t know HOW to change?  I invite you to take a good look at what you are doing.  What pops into your head as something you have avoided trying?  I challenge you to go for it!  Step out of that comfort zone, Feel the fear and DO IT ANYWAY

Start small… Pick something to change… Set a NEW goal, make a new plan, DO IT, then evaluate the results.  Figure out what worked, what didn’t, make some tweaks and do it AGAIN!

I work with clients on a daily basis helping them NOT live this definition and find growth in leaps and bounds!  If you need help let me know!  I’d be happy to help you too!

Feel the Fear & Do It Anyway!

FEAR

I have to admit… I am not afraid of much of anything.  That doesn’t mean I never get nervous, but a true fear of something is rare for me.  That is until you want to touch my nose!  I have suffered from almost daily nosebleeds for 5 years.  A simple 20 minute visit to the ENT could have stopped it long ago. However, FEAR stopped ME in my tracks!  I had an unfortunate instance with a student nurse during an ER trip where she practiced inserting an NG tube on me for the very first time.  Needless to say she wasn’t very good at it her first time (I guess that’s why they have to practice).  The experience caused a full blown panic attack for me that I can still replay in my mind in full detail (and just about give myself a NEW panic attack while doing so!)  So, I lived with the nosebleeds because I was AFRAID. 

 

I have heard fear described as False Evidence Appearing Real (F.E.A.R).  Often times what we imagine will happen is not nearly what actually happens.  We make up a scenario in our mind of how it might play out.  We fear rejection, we fear failure, we fear pain, we fear being uncomfortable, we fear we can’t handle a situation, we fear embarrassment, and on and on and on.

 

The sad part about it is that we buy into our own fear.  We buy into the scenario our mind MADE UP!  It’s not REAL. Yet we treat it as “truth” stopping us from completing tasks or enjoying experiences… sometime even meeting people. In my case it stopped me from getting medical treatment that I needed.  Today I felt the fear (and boy did I feel fear!) and DID IT ANYWAY!  Only to find out reality wasn’t nearly as bad as I imagined it would be. 

 

We are all fearful of something.  Some are rational… but MOST are NOT. I find this to be true especially in business.  We fear going to a new meeting or group where we don’t know anyone.  Therefore we miss out on building relationships and growing our exposure and reputation.  We fear offering our service because we are sure they will say no or that it is too expensive or whatever excuse we made up in our mind for them.  We don’t try a new idea because we are afraid it won’t work and then we “fail”. So we just don’t do anything.  Where does that get us?  Nowhere and fast! 

 

Life is full of risks.  Some work out, some don’t.  My husband often says, “It doesn’t hurt to ask… we are already at no.”  So, when you get a NO that simply means nothing changes.  So I challenge you today… do something you have been afraid of… something you have been putting off.  You will either realize it’s not so bad, you will realize it is not worth the risk and can move on and stop thinking about it, or you may surprise yourself and find a fantastic solution to a problem!

 

What are you living with because you are afraid or fearful?  What are you missing out on because of it?  What would you do right now in your business if you KNEW you couldn’t fail?? Share with me!  I can’t wait to hear what you OVERCOME today!  Feel the FEAR and to it ANYWAY!  

Plan Your Work and Work Your Plan!

I love the quote “A goal without a plan is just a wish” Yet I find many women in business don’t really have a plan.  They may think they know what they want… but they really don’t have a method to get there.  Mary Kay (and many other direct sales companies) year goes from July 1st through June 30th!  Did you end up where you wanted to be?  Either way… Happy New Year!  It’s a fresh start, a clean slate, a crisp white page!  What are you going to write in your next chapter?  Where will you be this time next year?  Now is a great time to evaluate, dream and most of all PLAN for success!

Reflect: Take some time to look back on the past year (or few months) in your business. What did you do that worked?  What didn’t?  If you had a goal poster or a goal list, pull it out and check off what you accomplished!  Look back and remember the highs (and the lows) and reflect on what you learned!

Review: Take time to REALLY review your business plan, your business systems and your business budget.  If you don’t have these NOW is the time to create them!  These 3 pieces are critical to growing your business.  All of these should be fairly detailed.

Re-set:  What do you want in the next 90 days? Next 6 months? Where do you want to be this time next year?  Take time to Dream BIG!  Nothing is off limits! Make a new goal poster with dates!  Give yourself deadlines.  More importantly define your WHY… why are you working toward these goals? Make Daily, Monthly, quarterly and annual goals… Eat that elephant one bite at a time!

Revise:  You’ve looked at what worked and what didn’t and reviewed your business plan and business budget.  You’ve decided what you are working toward and why! Now revise your systems!  Do more of what worked and revise what didn’t.

Re-evaluate: If you carry inventory now is a great time to do a re-count.  You are required to do a physical inventory count at the end of the year for tax purposes, but now is also a good time to check in and make sure your physical count matches what your expectation is.   If you have an inventory management program be sure your virtual shelf matches your physical shelf.  Note what is moving quickly and what is a little dusty.  Look for expired product and be sure you are rotating your product (1st in, 1st out).  Next re-evaluate what you want to keep on hand.  Do you have too much on your shelf or not enough?  Decide what your goal is as far as product on hand goes.  Stay tuned for a 2 part blog on what to do with expired product and how to stay stocked with the new items and what your customers want.

Re-Schedule:  The beauty of working for yourself is you get to make your own schedule.  Take some time to re-visit your work schedule and make changes.  Set a schedule of when you will be working.  Plan what you will be doing.  Include Income Producing Activities (IPA’s) as well as the business management tasks that need to be done.

NOW you are ready to Rock!  Taking a small amount of time to plan can make all the difference, but only if you work that plan!

Share with me your #1 goal for this year AND your ULTIMATE S-T-R-E-T-C-H goal below in the comments!  Dream BIG!

Are you paying attention to what you are saying to yourself??

Self-Talk-Poster-2-15-13

Our mind is powerful… Henry Ford said, “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.” Similarly Mary Kay Ash said,” If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can’t, you’re right.”

This past weekend I was out running and some guy in a maroon car yelled something No-so-nice to me out his car window as he drove by.  In the moment it REALLY hurt my feelings.  But in the moment I didn’t understand why.  I walked the final mile home, choking back tears and letting some flow.  I walked in my door, sat down at my computer and wrote this Facebook post:

“To the A-hole who yelled “get moving Fat Ass” to me at mile three of my four mile jaunts… if your intention was to hurt my feelings… you succeeded, BUT only for a moment. Yes, I choked back tears for the rest of my run. I am aware I am painfully slow and I realize I am fat… thanks for the news flash. However, I refuse to give you my power or my confidence. I will be back out there tomorrow and the day after… running at MY pace FAT ASS and all! At least I am OUT THERE! I suspect that if you EVER ran a mile that you didn’t HAVE to you’d have more RESPECT than to yell something like that. Now back to paying attention to people that I care about and that MATTER.”

That post got 19 Likes and 39 comments – all supporting me and bashing that moron for being rude. Thanks Guys!  **Blush**

Even though the purpose of me posting that in my mind was to get it out and move on, instead I found myself harping on his words and how crushed I felt in that moment.  While I ran today (the exact same route) I continued to process this… At about the same place in the workout that the guy in the maroon car had yelled out at me, I had a new epiphany!  I realized that his words were so hurtful to me that day because he was reinforcing what I was telling MYSELF that entire run prior to passing him in his maroon car.  My “self-talk” that day was not kind.  I was beating myself up for gaining weight, for letting myself fall out of shape after completing a half marathon in October of 2011, for being “painfully” slow, for my clothes being tight, etc. etc. etc.  If I had heard anyone speaking to someone the way I was talking to myself in my mind I would have told them how rude and disrespectful they are!

Yes, today I ran the same route, however the “self-talk” was different.  I ran the 4.21 Miles in the exact same amount of time, on the exact same roads, in the exact same direction, but this time I felt lighter and enjoyed the run MUCH more.  I reminded myself where I came from.  I took the time to look around, enjoy the buds on the trees and the sunshine on my face.  I listened to my favorite band (Bon Jovi) and sang along in my head.  When my legs hurt I said to myself, “you got this!  Just go to that tree up there” I sort of made a game out of it.  It was the same course but it felt completely different!

What do you say to yourself?  Are you getting in your own way?  I think we sabotage ourselves much more than we realize.

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world. ~ Buddha”

Self-Talk

We should be paying attention, because what we say to ourselves has a direct impact on our success – or failure.  Controlling our self-talk takes practice and discipline.  Even when we think we are doing well… that little voice of doubt sneaks in when we least expect it to.  The negative talk slowly takes over and becomes our new, unwanted mantra.  Before we can eliminate the negative self-talk we must first be aware of it!

The most common form of negative self- talk is “I Can’t” I challenge you to pay attention to when you speak or think the words “I can’t” and then ask “Why can’t I?”  Use this awareness with any negative thing you want to replace… change the word or phrase to something more powerful and positive!  You can even go so far as to create a positive affirmation.  Use ALL your senses…Visualize it, even cut out pictures if you can, Say it out loud in a powerful voice, imagine how it will feel, etc.  This works with ANY goal!

By being intentional about what we are thinking and paying attention to how we talk to ourselves, we can create a mindset to achieve the life we are after – whether it’s something personal or something professional, we’re likely to do better and most importantly, feel better about what we are doing.

I’d love to hear some of YOUR positive affirmations… Comment below with an affirmation you’d like to share!  And don’t forget to subscribe to be notified when new blogs are posted!

 

You Only Get One Chance to Make a First Impression

Your Guide to Creating and Effective Elevator Speech

from the 1 sentence HUB statement, to the 30 Second Intro, to the 60 Second Commercial!

You’ve been there… that moment when you‘re asked, “What do you do?” For a split second the excitement pulses through you and you think “THERE IT IS!  It’s MY opportunity to talk about my business!!!”…and then it happens… you freeze responding with a nervous giggle or blurt out something that sounds like you just spoke in a different language?  The polite response is usually something like, “Oh that’s nice” end of conversation.  Networking & referral chance blown!  SO what do you do?  You consciously create (and practice!) a series of responses that can be used in a variety of different circumstances.  When you have a prepared elevator speech you come across more confident and professional when you meet new people who might be interested in your services.

An elevator speech is the quick statement you would offer someone in an elevator who asks “What do you do?” The term “Elevator Speech” was coined because your time in an elevator is limited so your message needs to be short and to the point or about the amount of time the ride in an elevator takes. The goal is not to gather leads or sell something on the spot, but instead to start a business relationship. That begins with a conversation.  It is important to have a mindset of “how can I serve you,” not “what can I sell you.”  Remember you are beginning to build a relationship here.

You can use this DAILY to find clients and referrals while you are out an about ANYWHERE!  It should be second nature and roll off your tongue with ease.  You can be your own walking marketing tool!

Before you begin to create, do a little reflection (make some lists):

  • Center yourself – Take some deep breaths… then find your confidence.  CONFIDENCE will make or break you during 30 second intros!  Get excited!
  • What is your passion?  What are you excited about offering?  Make a list of your strengths, adjectives that describe you or your services.  What do you want your potential client to feel? What do you want to solve or represent?
  • Who is your target market? What does your ideal client look like? It’s crucial to be specific here.  Having a ʹgenericʹ elevator pitch is almost certain to fail, so be specific as to who your target audience is.
  • Know Yourself and what you have to offer – Before you can convince anyone of what you have to offer them, you need to know exactly what it is you are excited about. You need to define precisely what you are offering, what problems you can solve and what benefits you bring.

 

Next up: make a HUB statement – Hottest Undeniable Benefit

Your HUB statement is one succinct, distinctive and compelling sentence that allows people to immediately grasp who you work with, on what, and the benefits resulting.  This sentence should not mention your actual position or what you do in most cases.  By recognizing your hottest undeniable benefit, you will hone in on what you do for your customers.  The best HUB Statements appeal to people’s feelings. What benefit do you offer that appeals to people’s feelings the most?

People want to know what you can do for THEM… they don’t really care how long you’ve been in business or want to listen to some techno jargon from your field.  They want a clear concise answer to “what do you do” (and more importantly – what’s in it for me).

Let’s get creating…

First you want to choose the “who”?  Remember, you are not trying to market to EVERYONE… who is your target market?  Be specific! Pick a group you have knowledge about and a passion for.  Remember your HUB statement is NOT intended to be an all-inclusive that limits you to work with only THAT type of client.  You are using this for marketing purposes… if you try to market to everyone you’ll be too generic and people will lose interest before you finish the sentence.

Second, think of a specific challenge that particular group faces.  This is the “what”.  Make it something specific AND compelling!  What problem can you or your services solve for them?

Finally, think of a few words that describe your undeniable benefit – the unique talent or skill that you will use to support the target market.  This is the “how”.  How will you solve their problem?

Simple but dynamic words and phrases will come across more clearly and professional.  The sentence structure is often something like this, “I work with (who) _________ to (what) __________ by providing (how) _______________.

Write a few sentences down on paper… Let it settle and sit… walk away from it then go back to it, cut out the unimportant words and make it powerful! There you have it!  A concise, one sentence HUB statement!

Now that you have a rockin’ HUB statement, broaden it into a 30 second intro.  On most people’s 1st attempt you will actually create your 60 second commercial.  This can include website or how to contact you, etc. You can then cut out extra words or sentences to make your 30 second intro from your 60 second or vice versa… if you create a 30 second intro add more description etc. to make it 60 seconds.

Begin your 30 second intro by stating your name and company name.

Next give your HUB statement!

Finally restate using different words about what you offer and the benefits of doing business with you.  Try to stay away from lingo that someone outside your industry wouldn’t understand.  You are trying to be captivating and inviting.  Intriguing the listener to want to know more about what you can do for them and what your business has to offer them.   THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU!  Keep the focus on what’s in it for THEM.  How will you solve a problem THEY have.  But you can express why you are unique, what makes you stand out from the crowd.

Some choose to conclude with “a good referral for me would be_______” and others end by restating your name and company name or website.  It really depends on your audience in the moment.  You have to go with what FEELS good to you.  You certainly don’t want to feel awkward when saying it.

Other helpful points:

  • PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE!!!  Did I mention you must practice?
  • If you have the opportunity to give a 60 second commercial and you are “done” before the time is up… STOP TALKING!  It’s better to give a short and sweet intro than to ramble on.
  • If speaking to someone who is clearly NOT your target market or ideal client… Turn it into a referral request… What would be a good referral for you?
  • Don’t be TOO catchy or cutsie… you want to be memorable and referable… but too over the top will turn people off.
  • WORK ON YOUR HANDSHAKE!  Seriously! NO ONE likes a limp handshake!
  • Don’t be so serious.  Have fun! Be approachable, welcoming & exciting.
  • Make an impression! Make a connection!  Be memorable!
  • Your HUB statement, 30 second Intro and 60 second commercial should be revisited OFTEN.  You must keep it fresh and you must change it up for different needs.  Every business grows and changes, and your introduction needs to grow and change with it.
  • Content is important, but delivery makes all the difference. Find your confidence!
  • Adjust the pitch to the person who is listening. Tailor what you say to who is in front of you.

I’d love to hear what you come up with!  Send me a message or post a comment.  If you need help why not request your sample session or if you are already a client, bring it up at our next coaching appointment!